What a remarkably insightful, profound post, Lesley-Anne. lived in Kelowna once too. I have felt the sting of “being shunned for my own good”(so I was told) buy my so-called brothers in my church. I chose to love my now spouse before we were married — and was labelled a fornicator. I know what this feels like. But I’ve realized that taking the lesser place was my only option. To love those who scorn us, we must do this. It is the truth of real humility. It is what Christ meant when He said “the first shall be last”. As an active Contemplative, I understand this now. It doesn’t erase the pain — it only helps me to make more sense of it. GBU, AAM

holding out hope

Today is my birthday. I am choosing to spend this part of my day alone and writing. It is good for me.

People might be surprised to know I was excommunicated from my church for marrying my husband, over 29 years ago. I have denied my pain, making light of it whenever it came up in conversation. I made it about my husband’s woundedness, rather than my own.

Oh, I knew what would happen. I grew up in a fundamentalist church, and knew their stand on being “unequally yoked.” When the elders contacted me about my engagement to a Catholic, I agreed to meet with them. No big deal, really. A formal letter was read to the church announcing my “outside place.” Friends and family I had grown up with, shunned us. My finance never understood why the church would turn against us, rather than rally around us. But I always knew why. I chose him. I still do.

Years later…

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